What are the best bakes? In my opinion, they’re not British, but rather from Aus and NZ. These classics are always on my mind.

I know, I know, that’s probably going to get a few UK readers in a lather, but, after a solid decade of consuming British baked goods, I’m unimpressed.

What could possibly be seen as controversial, I’d even go as far as to say they’re seriously overrated, and over, well, everything.

Why? What’s wrong with British bakes?

The constant one-up-man-ship on everything is… sad. It’s not good enough to just enjoy a classic caramel slice. No, it has to be marketed as a ‘millionaire slice’ or a ‘salted caramel millionaire slice’. Cause more must mean better. But, before you can get satisfied with one of those, a ‘billionaire’ slice is now front and centre in many bakeries.

What’s with the constant ‘update’ or replacement propaganda? Why is enough never enough? Why are all the British bakes so over the top? Loaded with cheap fats, salt and sugars, and they all taste the same. Hilarious, given the outrageous sugar tax and fat-phobic narrative in British society. Literally creating the demons they then persecute.

There’s nothing I’d like more than to go into a cafe, and have an in-house made bake that actually tastes like its name suggests. Imagine, a brownie that is rich and chocolatey, but doesn’t make you gag on the saccharine-sweetness.

How about a caramel slice where you can taste the biscuit base, the luxuriantly smooth fudge caramel, and a thin layer of dark chocolate on top. Or a blueberry muffin that’s not over-inflated with sugar and fat where you play spot the blueberry.

Add into this conundrum the decline in quality of brands like Cadbury, whose ‘chocolate’ no longer tastes like ‘chocolate’, owing to the lowered amount of cocoa solids, in comparison to Australian equivalents. Don’t even get me started on the invasion of palm oil into everything. Yuck.

So, what do I think are good bakes? Well, here’s a list.

Recommended Aus/Nz bakes:

Wagon wheels – yes, the supermarket ones are better known, but I’m referring to the ones you’ll find in bakeries. They are far superior to the mass commercial ones, and as you will see below, you can also get them with white chocolate too! Circular wedges of sweet biscuits are sandwiched together with thick raspberry jam, and a smear of fluffy marshmallow, coated in either milk or white chocolate. Not recommended if you’re diabetic, or don’t have a sweet-tooth, they are a hardcore sugar hit for the energy-challenged.

Vanilla slice (aka, snot block) – put aside the ‘custard slice’ and wrap your laughing gear around these. Made with puff pastry top and bottom, a thick custard laminated between them, and doused in vanilla icing. There are regional debates over whether it should be white or pink icing, icing or icing powder, and whether or not there should be a smear of raspberry jam on the bottom pastry. Don’t get sucked in, they’re all beaut, and all beat the ubiquitous British custard slice.

Jam tart – not what you may be expecting. These tasty treats are familiar to most Aussie kids. They’re the kind of bake your nan or aunt might make in the holidays. Quick and easy to make, they’re only small and have a sweet shortcrust pastry shell, that are then filled with jam, usually raspberry or apricot.

Aus/NZ Bakes of renown:

ANZACS – forget your ‘flapjack’, try these bikkies instead. Yes, they are loaded with sugar, that’s their natural preservative for a longer shelf-life (or to be shipped halfway around the world), but they’re also packed with rolled oats and desiccated coconut. If you want to know more about our shared ANZAC pride and joy, and the name of this biscuit, go read this.

Passionfruit slice – maybe it’s the tropical/sub-tropical nature of our islands, but passionfruit is a popular flavour for us. A less aggressive tang that’s similar to citrus, it’s a refreshing option for drinks, desserts, and of course, baked goods. You’ll find it on our summer pavs, on vanilla slices, in bikkies, and this slice. A thin biscuit base and a thick passionfruit confection on top, made from sweetend-condensed milk and passionfruit pulp, it’s too good to miss!

Ginger slice – more popular in New Zealand, this traybake is a delicious alternative to a caramel slice. Made in a mashed-up mix of part biscuit-base, part rich ginger topping. Not difficult to make, it will easily amuse young and old bakers alike, as well as give you that lip-smacking ginger hit many of us enjoy.

Savoury Bakes:

Pies, it has to be our pies. We serve them HOT! One thing I cannot abide is the lukewarm offerings in the UK. Whilst I understand the ‘why’, it’s still unacceptable.

Aussie meat pie – what makes this bake better than the British one? Everything. Flaky golden pastry that adds just enough satisfaction in each bite, but doesn’t cover you in crumbs. The filling is meaty, not sloppy, and has real chunks of meat – be that beef, chicken, or any other combination. Tomato sauce, not ketchup, we’re Australian, not American. Tomato sauce is a MUST with your pie.

Caulioccoli pie – not a meat-eater? No worries, have one of these! Made with the standard pasty, this cauliflower, broccoli and thick cheese sauce pies are to die for. Popular even with meat lovers, this pie really satisfies! Check out Beechworth Bakery if you want a good one!

Kiwi Mince and Cheese – whilst it’s hard to admit that NZ does anything good, this pie wins every time! The pastry combination of shortcrust bottom and puff on top is a winner, and the densely-packed meaty gravy and minced beef filling is just the ticket. Add into it the melty-gooey-cheesy melted cheddar, and they have a great pie. Don’t believe me, go check out: HowToDadNZ

More Aus/NZ bakes to watch out for:

Hedgehog – the humble Aussie treat that makes ‘tiffin’ look like the sugared up narcissist it really is. It’s not nearly as sweet as it’s made with plain Marie biscuits, cocoa powder and sweetend-condensed milk. It’s nothing like the overly-sweet ‘chocolate’ tiffin you find in the UK. It also contains a higher amount of broken biscuits, giving it more of a dense slice mouth-feel, not a melting chocolatey mess. Oh, and you can put 100s and 1000s on the topping too!

Caramel slice – everything in the correct proportions! It’s a caramel slice, not a chocolate slice. We don’t need salt, or extra salt. If the caramel is made properly, the flavour speaks for itself. It should have a thin biscuit base, just enough to support the caramel. The chocolate on top? Just enough to coat it evenly and so it ‘snaps’ when cut or bitten into. That’s all. Let the rich, smooth, fudgy caramel do the talking here.

Apple teacake – it’s not a cake! Well, it can be, thats true. That is to say there is a plain sponge cake that has apple pieces mixed through it, and it can be served at afternoon tea. This is not that. This, this is a cousin to the Wagon wheel. It’s a dense shortcrust/shortbread-like pastry circular bottom and an oversized circular top that covers a generous dollop of diced apple pie filling. Once baked until lightly golden, it’s then inundated with thick vanilla icing, coating it until it pools at the base.

Last but not least, bakes not to overlook:

You couldn’t possibly have a baked good review without these two. Whilst they’re not iconic Aussie or Kiwi, they are a firm cultural favourite, and I think we do them best.

Cinnamon roll – also known in other countries as swirl or a bun, we call ’em a roll. Because they’ve been ‘rolled’ up. Logic. Made from a sweetened bread dough, this bake has a filling made from butter, sugar, and just enough cinnamon to hit you full-force. Baked until golden, and served with a cream cheese icing, they should never be underestimated.

Doughnuts – last, but never least, and whilst also not an Aussie or Kiwi origin story, we do ’em justice. Whether it’s the ring doughnut from your local bakery, with its chocolate/strawberry/vanilla/caramel icing topping, or the famous hot jam doughnuts from Melbourne’s Victoria Market, they are divine.

Final thoughts on Brit vs Aus/NZ bakes:

So, there you go. These are the bakes I’d recommend if you can get them, or perhaps try making them at home? If you’d like recipes for them, drop me a line via here, and maybe I’ll get some recipes up on this blog too?!

What’re your thoughts? Do you reckon Aussies and Kiwi’s know what we’re on about? Leave a comment on whichever platform you’re reading this, and let me know what you think. Who does it better, British vs Aus/Nz, and let me know which one of these tasty Aus/Nz bakes would you like to try?